Click on the pictures or other links to see larger images

I’d been putting it off for a while, joining Twowheelsdad in the Chiltern Hills Enduro Club H&H series. Previously there had been good excuses, I rode an xr600 and considered it too large to race. So I bought a ktm but things always sort of ‘got in the way of racing’. Now this year I’d publicly stated that I’d definitely join in but again nearly missed out by getting too involved in launching my website and organising the Dirty Bastard’s trip to Wales. I managed to scrape in at number 133 out of 140 with Zulu joining me on the back row with number 132. TWD on the other hand was mid pack with number 60.

TWD on the left No:60.................RBJ No:133 and Zulu No:132

The week running up to the race was fairly nerve racking – to be honest I was shitting myself! I calmed down a lot when Tyron explained that if you try and ‘race’ you’ll be bolloxed in no time, he had to pit in his first race. This made sense so I vowed to myself to take it easy at first. TWD said all the same things – take it easy etc etc but I’m sure he thought his advice was falling on deaf ears!

The Race – Part One

Still nice and calm (sort of) I pulled away fairly smoothly and slotted in behind a couple of guys. After a few turns we went straight up a bank and a series of sharp drops and banks followed with some rough parts in between. Now I’d been riding in Wales a few weeks ago where slopes and rough ground is the norm so I found it easy and I was amazed how cautious most people where! So I overtook a couple of guys and blam, the red mist came down out of nowhere!

I went into full race mode and past a few more on the short back straight. At the water splash I realised I was way too hyper, I already had arm pump! After the splash and along the slippery section I was relieved to be caught behind a lot of slower riders and we went along in a line through the trees into the sapling wood. After that came the main straight and by this time I was a bit rested so went for it again in the mx area of the track. This too was very tight and I found it a bit difficult to pass slower guys and clipped one poor chap, sorry mate! By the time I got to the splash again my hand was completely numb! Again a rest through the woods and after that I managed to slip into a bit of a rhythm. I still found it hard to pass in the woods but out braked guys on the corners after the straight and used the scott damper to good effect over the rough stuff and blocked passed in the mx area.

Third or forth lap and I've caught up to a lot of slower riders

There was one bloody tree branch stump sticking out that I hit every damn lap, sometimes I thought I’d missed it only to ride straight into it again a few trees later and my left arm and shoulder are covered in bruises! Highlight of the first session was catching and overtaking TWD in the sapling wood who then made some lame excuse about “going the wrong way” in the woods so lost time! I did manage to stall the bike coming out of the water splash on my second to last lap for some reason. Not sure why as I’d not struggled on it at all so far, the bike coughed then stopped and I slumped against the wall. Hitting the magic button fast I pushed off with my elbow and gunned it as the marshal ran forward, who then had to jump out the way as a tired and embarrassed ktm rider tried to flatten him!

Great sequence of photos these: in the first one, above left, you can see TWD in the background, with the camera on sport mode it captures the overtake on No:7 perfectly...

and still going for it.

I was trying to work out when I should stop for lunch but that ruined my concentration so much I started making mistakes and clipped a few trees with my body armour so I carried on until I could see guys stopping and then stayed out for another lap or two. It was always my intention to get another one in at lunch but next time I’ll have to sort out some sort of count down clock.

Me out braking and passing on the rough ground.... plus one of the bridge on the other side of the track

............................................................................................................................

Lunch

Boy was I tired! I’d ended up doing just what I said I wouldn't do, ‘race’ the entire first session! I gulped down isotonic drink, lucosade and a cheese and ham roll before filling up the bike with petrol. A far too short a sit down and they were starting again! Oh no, how am I going to keep that up for another hour and a half!

............................................................................................................................

The Race – Part Two

This time I was much more relaxed so I could go just as fast on the mx track but now I also managed to do a few sneaky passes in the woods. I did pull over a few times for a couple of quick riders but it’s so tight in the woods you have to resort to either cutting some corners or taking an alternate line to get by. It’s not the slower guys fault; they are having their own race. Having said that, loads of guys did pull over when they could in the trees. I did have trouble getting by some slower guys on the mx bit though. Quite often you end up following them so close trying for a gap to overtake that when they bottle a slope/incline you run the risk of ramming them! I had to stop dead at the top of one slope as the slower rider in front had a moment of indecision and to stop ramming him into next week I slammed on the brakes and ended up on my arse at the bottom of the slope. I picked the bike back up cursing him under my breath and charged around after him, getting the pass somewhere before the water splash. Oh and don’t let me start on the quads, get a bike damn it, you’re blocking the racing line!

Several shot of me - almost looks like I know what I'm doing!

Several shot of TWD - looking cool on the MX part of the track

As you well know it was a hot old day and trying to drink enough was an issue, I could feel I was getting a bit low on fluid so made an effort to suck on the camel pack some more, not easy when your breathing like a steam train on speed! At one point I started to wonder how much longer I could keep going and chanced a quick look at the clock on the ktm’s dash (fearing there was still 45 minutes or more) and was shocked to see time was nearly up! Time for one more lap after this one, so I made it a good’un. I’d asked my girl friend to signal me to stop near the end as in race mode I’m useless with times and saw her near the end of the lap. Not wanting to incur penalty points I paused wondering if I should chance it? How fast was my lap – mm haven’t a bloody clue! When I noticed TWD talking to a marshal and pulled up next to him, we both then decided to pull in. Once I calmed down I realised I should have done one more lap. I was physically finished so pushing that one last lap, where it can go all pear shaped and end up with penalty points did not make sense. Still wish I’d done it though!
TWD said about his second session “I could not have ridden that one better” so he had a good run and Zulu enjoyed himself but not sure how he fared position wise.

So tired I can't get body armour off........................happy days................time to pack the car full of hot sweaty dirt things - and our kit too!

Thanks also to Scottrider who came to shout some encouragement at us in the morning, its fun having someone pop up out of nowhere and shout ‘COME ON JOHN’ every now and then! Although you'll have to forgive me for not stopping for a chat, unlike TWD I believe!

So now it’s time to wait for the results, eeeee I can’t wait!

Fookin Hell !!!! 9th in class and fastest lap at the end of the day !!!!!!

Below are photo's taken by a chap on the Chiltern Hills Website. I got too impantient to wait for him to get out the way so i went for it, hope I didn't hurt the foot mate - sorry!

Thanks for the Chilton Hills Enduro Club for putting on a well run race.

We are all booked up and entered for the next round on the 20th of May. Myself (redbikejohn) Twowheelsdad, Scottrider and Tyron all entered. we are also trying to get Zulu to enter so it should be a good showing for Club Dirty Bastards Race Team!

If you enjoyed this report and would like to be notified of new reports or website updates then join the mailing list. To sign up to the list just click HERE>> and send me an email.